Protectors of The A-Team

A/N: Protectors of the Plot Continuum was founded by Jay and Acacia. Excerpts taken from Deception: Alex's Past by Murdock's Crazylady. This mission was chronicled by IndeMaat.

Deception: Alex's Past


Tasmin sat behind the console. She was working on a charge sheet for A-Team fics. So far they had been working on a hunch. It was about time there was an official list of charges. She was working from her memory and from the little scraps of paper that Allison had put in an envelop and marked 'file'. Tasmin knew she herself was in part to blame for this: she hadn't instructed Allison on proper file keeping. For the other part she blamed the Marquis de Sod, the Director of Personnel, for saddling her with a partner that didn't even have basic office skills in the first place. The only thing Allison had going for herself was that she had a very clear handwriting.

She heard some stirring behind her and looked around. Allison had been sleeping on the sofa and seemed to be waking up.

"Good, you're awake." Tasmin turned back to the console. "I want to pick your brain about something."

Allison quickly scrambled to her feet and ran out off the door.

"What did I say?" Tasmin asked rhetorically.

-oOo-

About half an hour later Allison returned and threw a soft ball ball at Tasmin. She hit her in the head.

"Ouch! What's that for?" Tasmin turned around to her partner rubbing her sore spot.

"We have a SEP field?" Allison exclaimed.

"It feels more like a headache to me."

"We have a Someone Else's Problem field? And you make us go into fics in disguise?"

"I thought you liked to play dress up."

"Whatever gave you that idea?"

"The first time we used disguises you picked them out, remember?"

Allison vaguely did. "That's because I thought we needed to be disguised to go round in a fic."

"We don't. That badge on your uniform creates a SEP field that obscures you from being spotted by canon, because, well, we're not their problem." Tasmin pulled her duffel bag closer with her foot, rummaged through it, found what she was looking for and popped a chew tablet aspirin in her mouth. "Disguises have some uses though. They make us fit into the background easier so OCs are less likely to spot us. The SEP field doesn't work on them, 'cause we are their problem. Didn't they teach you all this in Basic Training?"

"I may have slept through one or two classes." Allison looked at her feet. "I'm sorry I hit you with that ball."

"So am I."

BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP!

"And now I'm even more sorry." Tasmin rubbed her temples. "This better be good."

Allison decided not to comment on that.

Tasmin got to her feet. "You check this fic out, while I go check what damage you have done." She walked over to the bathroom.

"By check out you mean read out from the console?" Allison called after her.

"Of course I do."

"Just checking." Allison turned to the console and started reading. Before she had finished the first chapter she was cursing herself for having already taken up all her holidays.

Tasmin came back into the office and without a word started packing up her bag. She slung it over her shoulder and with a little nod of her head indicated to Allison to open up a portal.

-oOo-

The two agents stepped into the fic without disguises. They were wearing their uniforms. Which for Tasmin consisted of black slacks, a tailored black shirt and black boots. Allison wore a black fitted T-shirt, black cargo pants and combat boots. Tasmin's duffel bag was army green; it wasn't PPC standard issue.

"You must have hit me harder with that ball than I thought. I'm seeing a green mist." Tasmin let the duffel bag slide off her shoulder and set it down on the ground. She rubbed in her eyes to see if that improved her vision. She hadn't seen any mist in their office.

"The mist came with the fic. And it's more jade or turquoise than green."

"Whatever. Where are we?"

"First chapter."

Tasmin rolled her eyes. This was not improving her headache. "Yes, of course we are in the first chapter. Where is this first chapter taking place?"

"Diner where Face meets the mother of the Sue."

"The mother of the Sue is probably also a Sue. Chip of the old block and all."

"I guess. Don't worry. The mother of the Sue dies in the same paragraph as the Sue is born. That's probably why the Sue was named after her."

"How tragic." Tasmin sat herself down at one of the tables and stared at Face staring at the Sue mother. "What does he see in her?"

"Apparently her smile." Allison was looking at the Words.

Tasmin squinted at the Words; this also did not improve her headache.

Normally he looked for Other things on a woman, but with Alex, it was different.

"What other things are there on a woman than her smile?" Allison asked.

"I don't know. Her clothes, the way they fall."

"Really? I mean, of course I know there are those things, but are those the things Face looks at at first?"

"He's an attractive guy; he looks for attractive women."

"Most of the series was set in a time when shoulder pads for women where the height of fashion. If there's one thing that doesn't make women attractive below the neckline, it's shoulder pads. Besides, I've always figured Face to be a mouth man. Or an eye man. Something in the face, 'cause that's where he's looking when he meets someone new."

"He probably feels the same about shoulder pads as you do."

The Sue mother gave Face her phone number, and while he ate his cold dinner Allison consulted Tasmin.

"Okay, er, I've slept more than a couple of hours during Basic Training," she said a little embarrassed.

"I already thought so."

"The thing is, coming up next is a couple of months of events told in as many sentences. So I don't know what that is going to do to us time rift wise."

"We don't follow them." Tasmin sighed. "I'll accept that you didn't pay attention during boring lectures by potted plants, but could you at least pay attention to the on the job training I am giving you." She opened the duffel bag and pulled out the Fic Location Follower. "The FLF is set to manual so we're staying here." She put the FLF on the table in front of her, so not to risk that it would switch to random or always when she slipped it in her bag.

This cheered Allison up. "While we're here, you want to grab a bite to eat?" she asked perkily.

"Why are you always thinking of food when we're in fics?"

"Because food in fics is generally better than food in PPC cafeteria."

"That's probably true."

Allison waved for a waitress.

"What's surprising about the Chicken Surprise?" she asked when the woman stood at their table.

"Whether there's actually any chicken in it."

Tasmin growled.

"Er, just the special for me."

Tasmin shook her head indicating she didn't want anything. The waitress nodded and walked away.

"Could you not do that?"

"What?"

"Make witty conversation with people you made up yourself. You're too old for imaginary friends."

"I'm too creative to make do with what I have."

That comment puzzled Tasmin. She shrugged it off. "Just tell me what I've missed so far. I can't read the Words with this headache you gave me."

"Let's see. Oh, Face and the Sue mother start dating. A month later she secretly meets Murdock, and a month after that she finds out she's pregnant with his baby."

"What? She jumped in the sack with him the day she met him?"

"It doesn't say, but it can't have been more than two weeks after they met. Anyway, she tells Face it's Murdock's baby and Murdock that it's Face's baby."

"My headache is just getting worse."

"Then she is diagnosed with cancer."

"You're making this up."

"Nope, someone else did."

"What kind of cancer?"

"The kind that kills you. She dies shortly after childbirth."

"Aargh. You know I feel for the mothers of these Sues, they all die young."

"Yes, but would you want to grow old if your kid was a Sue?"

"Good point. That thought cheered me up so much I think my headache is gone."

"Good. Now you can read the Words for yourself."

The waitress brought Allison her food. She stared at it dubiously for a moment, then dug in, occasionally looking up to keep an eye on the Words.

Murdock had nightmares for months, following Alex's death. Screaming every-night that he was being chased by the Grimm Reaper.

"I wouldn't mind dreaming about Matt Damon as a harvester," Allison said after swallowing. "He looked absolutely gorgeous in Brothers Grimm. That one moment, that shot through the door, he looked just like Beethoven." Tasmin opened her mouth. "Not the dog," Allison quickly added.

"Hmm. But I think Grimm Reaper is someone that reaps Grimms."

"That would be Cavaldi. I think that's more your kind of dream."

Tasmin smiled mildly. "Finish up your meal so we can leave here."

Allison slowly ate her meal. To Tasmin's comment that she usually wolfed down her food she replied that she recently learned the value of chewing properly.

"Annoying PPC agents is a ground for charging," Tasmin growled.

"For charging a Sue, not a ground for charging a fellow PPC agent." Allison pushed her plate away. "But I'm all finished now."

"Okay, let's go." Tasmin stood up, grabbed her bag and opened a portal.

"Hey, I can't leave without paying."

"Paying whom? There's no one here you can pay."

Allison looked around the diner. Tasmin was right; there was no one left there. Even her plate had gone. The table was still there, though it had become rectangular instead of round. The chairs had changed from wood to metal frame.

"Stop messing with my head."

Tasmin grinned. Normally she would have thought playing with the scenery was childish, but if it got Allison's goat, it was the right thing to do.

"Get through the portal," she said.

-oOo-

"Nice. I like how this mist clashes with the trees." Allison looked around. "Is this Langley? The story is set when the Team was working for Stockwell."

"I guess." Tasmin dropped her bag on the ground between them.

"What did I miss while I was eating?"

"The Sue's four year older brother, Trent, tried to kill her a couple of times."

"Maybe we could recruit him for the PPC."

"Did I mention that on all three occasions Trent was six years old and unsuccessful?"

"So? We don't expect six-year-olds to be perfect at violent acts. That would be a Sue trade if they were."

"Good point. I'll think about it. Anyway, after the failed assassination attempts Face sends Trent to his room."

"Good idea. Make him think of a better plan."

"Well, apparently, it was because Face didn't want to hit the boy. Hannibal felt differently and after the third time he gave the boy a good spanking."

"After which BA gave Hannibal a good thrashing?"

"Nope. BA thought Hannibal was absolutely right."

"What? I think my Character Analysis Device just blew up in my pocket, without even pointing it in the direction of anyone." Allison took it from her pocket to examine the CAD. It seemed all right. "Since when are any of the members of the Team into child abuse?"

"I have no idea. Face is being the loving father, though." Tasmin nodded to the Words.

By the time Alex was 3-years-old, Face had finally taught her how to open any kind of a lock or door, and how to scam stuff.

"Yeah, right. Three-year-olds don't even have the motor skills to color between the lines, let alone pick locks. Not to mention that they are not tall enough to reach the locks on most doors." Allison snorted. "What else can she do?" She fumbled in her pocket for her pencil and pad.

"Read, but that's not entirely uncommon at that age. Anyway, this Sue had all of them living together, and attributing in her upbringing."

"The Team lived together when they worked for Stockwell." Allison wrote down the charges she had spotted so far: OOCness, Sue powers, some mild misspellings, backstory the usual bonanza.

"Murdock lived separately."

"Well, this is an AU-fic anyway: Face has two kids."

Tasmin clenched her fists. She felt a strong urge to inflict pain on her partner, and no urge at all to suppress the earlier urge. "Just read the Words."

Hannibal had his share of love for the baby too. He always avenged her beatings from Trent, and he also showed her how to use a gun.

"Take cover." Allison dove to the ground. "Hannibal is about to explode."

Tasmin was pretty sure characters didn't actually explode upon character rupture. She threw a glance at Hannibal nonetheless before she grabbed Allison by her shoulder and pulled her back up, assuring her that there would not be bits of Hannibal flying about.

Allison dusted herself off. She cocked her head to read the Words. They were just explaining that when the Team went on a mission Trent was sent to a friend's house.

Alex always went with them.

Both agents dove into a nearby ditch. When after a few minutes still no large explosion had followed they carefully looked over the edge. They saw a four-year-old girl beat up her eight-year-old brother, with Murdock standing to the side cheering her on.

"It's this mist," Tasmin said. "I think it's toxic; it's making me hallucinate, making me see things that aren't really there."

"I see a little mini-decker going over there."

"Aargh, as if we didn't have enough trouble already. You'd think that authors would at least spell characters' names correctly, so we could recognize them despite all the OOCness."

"I think it makes sense to give characters new names after you've given them new personalities."

"Just you make sure you catch that little pest."

Allison hummed the A-Team tune to lure the mini-decker in her direction. The mini turned around and ran straight at the agents. Allison picked him up mid-run. He said his name was Hanibal and Tasmin gave him some chocolate cigars to keep him calm before she stuffed him in a jute sack.

With the jute sack slung over her shoulder Allison followed Tasmin through the portal to the next chapter.

-oOo-

"Don't we have already enough charges?" Allison whined. "I mean: there's four accounts of OOCness; four accounts of child abuse; two accounts of uncanonical children; one account of Sue powers; several accounts of misspelling, even a misspelling of a name." As if the mini-decker knew Allison was talking about him he give her a kick. "Ow. Quiet in there." A faint sniggering came from the sack. "I hate Hannibal minis. They are too much like him. But as I was saying. We have enough charges. We just add annoying PPC agents with green mist, find her, charge her and kill her."

"This is a long story. I bet there are many more charges to be found here." A smile played around her lips. "I kind of like this mist. It does obscure us from the characters."

"You think?"

"We're standing in front of the bay windows to the house looking in and neither of the OCs is noticing us."

"That's because they're too busy beating each other up." Allison put the sack down with a thud.

"I did not!" Alex yelled as she flew in and drop- kicked Trent. He was hit hard in the stomach, and he fell, hitting his head on the hard wood floor. He yelled out in pain. He didn't get the chance to stand back up because Alex was back on him like white on rice. "You better take that back fool, for I knock your head off!!" Alex screamed, seeing red.

"Great," Allison growled. "Anime style fighting and the kid learned her words from BA."

"Don't forget the double use of exclamation points. BA doesn't talk like that."

Allison let out another growl and wrote the charges down on her pad. Tasmin suggested they would sit on the lawn. The house was so ill described that all the walls were transparent and they could look into the rooms from any position.

"Chocolate chip cookie," Tasmin offered.

"Not saying no to that." Allison took two from the pack and threw one of them into the sack. Chocolate is a substance known for its calming effect on both PPC agents and mini-deckers.

Face meanwhile separate the two children and sent Alex to her room. Trent told him that Alex had taken Murdock's chopper keys. Face believed him.

"I'm glad at least one of them is showing a little consideration for the boy," Allison said taking another cookie. "I think part of the reason he's so badly behaved is because the Team are always taking sides with the girl."

"Yeah. It never had to get out of hand this far. The first time that boy tried to hurt his sister, BA should have taken him aside and have a stern heart to heart with him. 'You know little brotha, it's the job of big brothas to look out for their little sistas. So why are you tryin to hurt yo little sista?' Trent would have seen the error of his ways, and be much more pleasant, and a big part of this story would have lost its purpose."

"Yes, because BA has that kind of power of persuasion."

"Don't mock BA."

"I'm not. It's a fact of canon that BA has that kind of persuasion."

Tasmin eyed Allison. Allison tried to assure her with her smile that she had intended no harm with her comment. This seemed to work as Tasmin turned her head to look at the words.

"Face grounds both kids for fighting and then ... something I can't make out."

Alex scowled. Mission kill Trent ran into her mind without a cigar and she smiled.

"Kind of wish we had those babelfish in our ears," Allison sighed. "For translating Suvian to English."

"That's a different fandom."

"So is SEP fields."

Tasmin rolled her eyes trying to ignore that remark. "Let's get back to the story, shall we. BA's gonna be home soon and then the Sue is going to spar with him. And I for one would like to see how a short kid is going to spar with a huge man."

"Sure, where is this sparring going to take place?"

"In the back yard, I'm guessing. They have some kind of corral."

"So, we go over to the back." Allison scrambled up.

"I have a better idea." Tasmin grabbed Allison's arm. "We just change the layout of the grounds."

Allison started to smile as the corral appeared to the left of her and the house turned around. She was now looking into the kitchen.

"I like how you did that without making me nauseous. Nice view of the kitchen. All it needs now is Hannibal making some pancakes."

Hannibal walked into the kitchen and started rummaging through the cupboards. He took out a bowl, flour, eggs, and milk, and started mixing these ingredients together.

"I told you to leave canon alone."

"I didn't know I had this kind of power over canon."

"It must have something to do with his OOCness. It's almost like he's an Original Character himself."

"Making pancakes would be original for him, wouldn't it?"

"It might be. There's some more OOCness going on over there." Tasmin nodded her head toward the corral.

Alex was kicking the crap out of her older brother again and received the thumbs up from BA for this.

Allison snorted, then turned to ravaged the packet of chocolate chip cookies. "If BA wasn't so much bigger than me, I would like to kick the crap out of him," she proclaimed spraying some crumbs.

"I would probably help you too," Tasmin admitted.

Allison looked at her in surprise.

"A BA that just stands there looking on, cheering on, when a kid, any kid, is getting hurt, that is not our BA. That is an Original Character with a name tag. I don't mind at all kicking the crap out of some OC."

"I think the two of us could take him too. But it would probably work better if you first shot him in the knee caps."

"Fighting dirty, Allison?"

"He's twice the size of the two of us combined. It's not fighting dirty. It's evening the odds."

Tasmin chuckled. Despite that they were talking about hurting a canon character she liked the way her partner was thinking.

Allison sat back down when Face suddenly came rushing through the mist and sent Alex back into the house. BA tried to explain Alex had done nothing wrong.

"Alex DIDN'T attack Trent Face, Trent asked for it, He wanted to spar with her and she won." B.A. said.

"He thought that was sparring?" Tasmin jumped up. "Sparring is training without hitting hard. The way Trent was flying about the place should have made it clear to him that was not 'without hitting hard'. Or does he think that just because there was no hitting it was all right?" Tasmin was nearly foaming.

"Did you bring a dictionary? I'd like to throw it at him."

"No, I don't think I've got a dictionary, but I'm sure there's something else we can throw at him." Tasmin opened her duffel bag and started digging through it trying to find something to throw that would leave a dent, even on BA.

"Tasmin! Tasmin!" Allison grabbed her partner by her arms and tried to make her stop digging. Tasmin looked at her. "Tasmin, I was only making a joke. We can't really throw something at him."

Tasmin took a couple of deep breaths and shrugged off Allison's hands.

"I know. I'm sorry. I just lost it a little bit there. I ... I've never seen BA treat a kid like that."

"I know. Here, have some chocolate." Allison picked up a bar of chocolate Tasmin had thrown from her bag. She started to repack the bag. "I'm going to write up the Sue for making BA act like a love struck fool."

"But he's not love struck?" Tasmin wrestled with the wrapper of the bar. Allison took the bar from her, opened it for her and gave it back. "He's not following her about like a little puppy."

Allison put her hand against Tasmin's forehead to feel for a rise in temperature. "This thing with BA must have really shaken you up. Of course he is love struck. I'm sure it says somewhere he loves the little girl to bits. And he's acting like a fool."

"You're right." Tasmin swallowed her first bite of chocolate. "I'm amazed I didn't see that. But the chocolate is making me feel better. Thanks."

"That's what partners are for." Allison sat down next to Tasmin just in time to catch Face spanking Alex.

"I know it's all wrong Face is doing this, but she deserves this after what she did to BA."

"She deserves this for doing this to Face," Allison agreed. "Hey, do you think Face is taking it out on the kid that her mother cheated on him with his best friend?"

Tasmin slowly turned her head to Allison. "Using pop psychology is a charge."

"One, I'm glad you're back to your old self. Well, sort of glad. Two, again, it's a charge for Sues, not for partners."

Tasmin flexed her brows. Allison buckled under her stare.

"Really, just for Sues. Partners can say pretty much whatever they want. As long as they don't say those words to canon."

The Sue came storming from the house and went to the stables.

Alex found lil''T and climbed onto his shiny, bare back with nothing but a halter and a lead rope.

"This Sue is giving me a writing cramp. Do we follow her?"

"Course not, we take a portal."

"That's what I meant."

"But this time we're not. I looked at the Words. She's coming back and the main action is going to be played out here right in front of us."

"Sounds good to me." Allison lay down and closed her eyes. "Wake me up when there's anything good to see."

"I doubt there will be anything good to see in this fic."

"That's what I meant."

-oOo-

Tasmin poked Allison in her side when the Sue returned riding bareback with BA holding the lead. The rest of the Team had come out into the field to meet them. Allison looked up drowsily and focused her eyes on the Words.

Face stammered. He usually did if he thought Hannibal might yell at him.

"Tasmin! Tasmin!" Allison waved her arms about manically. "I'm having a bad dream." She panted heavily as if she were fighting off a ferocious monster. "Face is a spineless eight-year-old who's afraid of loud noises."

Tasmin pinched Allison. "It's not a dream."

"Reassuring words would be: it's only a dream." Allison sat up rubbing the sore spot on her arm. She threw Tasmin an angry look.

"I can't lie to you."

"Can't or won't?" Allison tucked her T-shirt back in her pants.

A high-pitched neigh caught B.A. off guard seconds later and he dropped the lead rope and had to get out of the way as Alex made Lil''T rear up.

"What do you suppose happened in those seconds?"

Allison threw her partner a look. "You are completely going to ignore that a little kid is sitting on a fullsize horse bareback and makes it rear without falling off?"

"I thought it was a hobby horse."

Both agents looked in the direction of the Sue as she galloped away on her own two legs holding a stick with a horse's head between her legs while clacking her tongue to mimic the horse's pace over cobblestones.

"How ...?"

"I read the Words. She never actually said she was riding a horse."

Allison rolled over laughing as the Sue disappeared from view.

"What do we do now?" Allison asked brushing some tears from her eyes. "Do we wait here for her to get back?"

"I just read that it takes two hours for Hannibal to think of a plan that involves sending Murdock after her."

The agents looked at each other.

"Do you suppose," Allison ventured, "that we are not in an A-Team fic at all, but that the Flowers have sold our still living bodies to a dodgy military research facility for endurance experiments to raise funding?"

"I'm not dismissing the suggestion off hand." Tasmin sighed. She took the remote activator from her pocket. "C'mon, I don't want to stay here any longer."

"You want to leave this fic without killing the Sue?"

"No, I just want to go to some other place in the fic. My eye fell on an ill chosen hyperbole that just looks awkward."

Allison quickly glanced the Words, until she saw what the Sue was doing.

Alex was dying laughing.

"Makes one wonder when she'll be done and we can go home."

"Not for a long while. There's plenty more chapters where this came from."

"I liked it better when we did the unfinished fics."

"This is an unfinished fic. Come."

Allison grabbed the sack with the mini in it and followed Tasmin through the portal hoping there would be something hard for her head on the other side.

-oOo-

The first thing she saw that suited her needs just fine was a stone column. She was about the bang her head against it when something occurred to her.

"Why are there all these stone columns around?"

"I'm rather puzzled about that myself. They're nice and green like the mist so they fit right in. Maybe something was wrong with the portal settings?"

"Maybe I imagined them because I wanted to bang my head on something?"

"Then just imagine them gone; they're in the way."

Allison tried, but the columns stayed. "On the bright side, there's something we can hide behind in case the characters finally burst."

"I can't believe the elasticity of these guys."

"I guess it has something to do with it being the 80s and nylon-lycra clothing being in fashion. Very elastic clothing that is. Leggings were made of it. Another fashion high."

"I just had the very scary image of people combining shoulder pads with leggings." Tasmin shuddered.

"It's why I stayed indoors and read books for most of the 80s."

"You're not old enough to remember most of the 80s."

"Lucky me."

"Enough of this. Murdock was just kidnapped."

and Face, the born worrier, worried about Alex as well as Murdock. He knew how close Alex was to him. He worried for Murdock because he didn't want to think of all the things the kidnappers might do to him. Murdock was his best-friend, and Face never forgot to worry about him. "He might as well be one of my kids!" Face said to himself, because indeed, he did worry about Murdock, a lot. He worried about him as much as he would if one of his kids was hurt. He worried about Murdock more than anyone else on their team.

"That's ... that's a lot of worrying."

"Even for Face," Tasmin added. She looked around. "We'll have to be careful around here; there are a lot of plot holes and I don't want us to fall into any of them."

The Sue was so worried for Murdock she started sparring with herself. She knocked herself out from exhaustion. While BA washed and dressed her, Hannibal and Face waited in the van for a call from Murdock. The call came. Hannibal answered it and received directions to a diner where he would get further instructions. BA carried Alex to the van and a moment later tore off.

"Where's the boy?" Tasmin asked.

Allison scanned the words and looked through the house. "I don't see him anywhere. I think the Sue has forgotten all about her brother."

"And apparently so have the Team. Write her up for that. These people are not suited to be taking care of children."

"I think we've pretty much established that."

The mini was stirring again in the sack. Allison swung it off her shoulder, thereby more or less accidentally hitting the sack against one of the stone columns.

"What do we do? Stay here or find another location for checking up on the Team?"

"I'm just checking the Words for what would be a good location. The Team seems to be moving around a lot in this fic."

"Well, they would, trying to find Murdock and his kidnappers."

The agents both looked at the Words; neither of them paid any attention while the mini crawled out of the sack. It ran a way a few yards, turned around and called out to Allison and Tasmin. Allison started after it. The mini got to the other side of a plot hole and taunted Allison with the direction it might take: go left or go right. Allison played this game along for a short while, then she tried to jump across. She had misjudged the size of the plot hole and fell in.

Tasmin rolled her eyes. She pulled a chocolate cigar from her duffel bag and held it out to the mini. The mini eyed her and then came over to get it. It even voluntarily stepped back into the sack. Tasmin grabbed the sack and her duffel bag and jumped through the plot hole Allison had disappeared through.

-oOo-

She almost landed on top of Allison.

"I told you to look out for plot holes and you go and jump right in one."

"Well, at least there isn't any green mist here anymore."

Tasmin glared at her. "No, it's purple. That's hardly an improvement." Tasmin thrust the sack at her partner. "And keep a better eye on the mini."

Allison looked into the sack. The mini gave her a mocking smile. Allison rolled her eyes and closed the sack.

"The action in this chapter mainly takes place in Borneo. Sounds familiar?"

"The Team once went to Borneo to save a general Ludlum and his daughter," Tasmin replied.

"That's the one."

"She's rewriting episodes now?"

The sound of thunder tore through the jungle.

"I don't remember that from the episode."

"Neither do I."

Tasmin and Allison made their way through the jungle as quickly as possible in the direction where the sound had come from. They stopped and hid in the undergrowth when they spotted Murdock and the Sue. There was some smoke coming from Murdock's ears. The agents looked at each other and then at the Words.

He fished around in his pack and pulled out a 9MM semi automatic, and he handed it towards Alex.

"I guess characters really do explode on character rupture," Allison said.

"They at least get the special effects to suggest character rupture has taken place."

She checked it and took the safety off. Murdock smiled as she slid it into the front of her jeans.

Tasmin smiled too. "The whole point to a safety is that you don't shoot yourself accidentally while wearing a gun down the front of your jeans."

The agents followed Murdock and the Sue. The latter two quickly found the encampment the rest of the Team had stormed earlier. They hid. Tasmin signaled to Allison to get down too. The rest of the Team were taken to a lock-up where they met general Ludlum and his daughter.

B.A., looking around as well, thinking of how much this place reminded him of Trent's bedroom, walked over and stood next to Cannibal.

A little head popped up in the undergrowth.

"Aw, not another mini," Allison whined.

"Here, use this." Tasmin gave her a chocolate cigar.

Allison wiggled the cigar. The mini locked eyes with it. It didn't move safe for licking its lips. Allison walked over to the mini and picked it up. The mini took the cigar and worked on removing the wrapper.

"No trouble at all." Allison smiled at Tasmin.

The mini took this as its cue to bite Allison in her arm. Allison stifled a scream.

"That one's called Cannibal," Tasmin said.

"No kidding." Allison opened the sack and dropped the mini in head first.

"I know we're only supposed to charge the Sue with crimes against canon," Tasmin said. "But I'm charging this one with child abuse too. BA just compared the boy's bedroom to a jail cell."

"It has been noted."

Tasmin turned her attention to the Words. Apart from the addition of the Sue the story followed that of One More Time pretty well. Up until the point where Murdock gave the Sue a flare gun and she caused the leaking gasoline drum to explode.

"Stealing lines," Tasmin muttered. "Stealing someone else's part is the same as stealing lines."

"Well, that's a new one. We didn't have that charge yet." Allison quipped.

"Do you have the charge of physical improbabilities yet? The six-year-old Sue is now firing her 9 mm and she is dead accurate."

"Hannibal did teach her well."

"I hate you."

"Well, Hannibal is going to take it out on her for taking the gun. Shall we go and watch that?"

"I know she's making Hannibal's character look like a Picasso, but that's no reason to look at it and discuss its artistic value."

"I meant watch the Sue get her punishment?"

"I think it's time for us to go and give this Sue her punishment."

"Finally."

"Before that we kill those OCs that kidnapped Murdock, but first we get the boy." Tasmin opened up the portal and stepped through.

"Poor kid. After all this he is going to die." Allison followed Tasmin the sack with minis slung over her shoulder.


A/N: At one point Tasmin and Allison encountered a number of stone columns. Tasmin suggested this was a portal problem. It was: in one of my browsers the text for chapters 2-4 was entirely in capitals. In other browsers I did not experience this problem.
Whenever an author misspells a character's name a mini-decker is created. A mini-decker is a little man, about 18 inches tall dressed in military fatigues, and has the looks of the character he is named after.

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